“Momma, can I tell ya something?” Her cruly hair covering an eye and her feckles somehow a truer brown in the light. I nodded, and studied her face. She seemed calm, relaxed and brushed her hair back. “I really really liked spending this day with you…you weren’t…busy.” She looks up at me and I crack a smile, as it cracks my heart..just a little because I knew she was right. “Me too baby. I can’t wait to be able to spend more days like today with you.”And just like that peace of my decision fell over me.
If you’ve not heard yet let me catch you up to speed. We are moving. Stephen was a top pick for a new job opportunity in San Antonio where he will be working as a software engineer and I will stay home. While it was a tough decision to leave or stay, with prayer and communication we both agreed that this transition will be a blessing to our little family.
There was silence after my daughter's comment, which gave me room to think about the new opportunity to be able to focus inward for a season, to grow and strengthen as a family, to learn more about one another, to have a better schedule to raise our babies, to make Jesus even more the center of the Vanovers home, to focus on us for some time. I sat down and thought after all these years, life is finally going to slow down some for us. Or, perhaps a better way to say it is we will be more available for one another.
Many of you know our journey from where we came to where we are now. It has been nothing short of a wild ride, and I can’t complain I have loved a piece of every step; however, when your husband takes you on vacation to relax and he tells you several times, “baby, I’m not sure you know how to relax,” you have a problem. Being candid here for just a minute, knowing that about myself does make me feel a bit intimidated about what is to come, because for so long my mentality has been go, go, go, but understanding that there is no higher calling than to serve my family--to serve my husband, to serve my children and raise them, makes the challenge an honor.
I cannot wait to see what all the kiddos and I get to do together. The paintings, the crafts, the play dates, the silly songs we’ll sing, the focus I’ll be able to give. It is overwhelming to think about.
Someone asked, “Are you so sad about not teaching anymore?” I thought about it for a while and then answered ,” No, I will always be a teacher. My teaching may look a little different now, but I will continue to teach, even if it is just my own children. There is so much to explain, show, and tell them, just so much to learn.” She smiled and I can’t tell you the smile it brought to my face to say that. The feeling was even better.
So friends, I sincerely ask, would you please join us in prayer on this next chapter of our lifes?
Here’s to being a stay at home Momma & teacher : )
Love,
Est
