Yes, I am willing, be clean.

“When Jesus came down from the mountainside, large crowds followed him. A man with leprosy came and knelt before him and said, “Lord, if you are willing, you can make me clean.” Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. “I am willing,” he said. “Be clean!” Immediately he was cleansed of his leprosy.” Matthew 8:1-3

I’ve read these verses a time or two before, and it never really meant anything deeper than what it was saying. (Jesus heals a man of leprosy) But, recently I scanned over it, and it was different this time around. I stopped and re-read these 3 verses 4 times in a row and with each time I read it slower.

After the 4th reading, I understood something more profound than just “Jesus healed a man with leprosy.” I saw something.
I saw myself.

This man had been carrying a disease. A burden. He was ill. He had been carrying around a sickness that was visible for all to see. His flaw was completely exposed out in the open for anyone to ridicule, judge, or gossip about..(I’ll get to more of that in a moment.) It doesn’t specify how long he carried around his sickness, but what I do notice is there came a time in this man’s life where he had made the choice to be willing and open for healing. Many people may look at this scripture as an example of just how amazingly willing Jesus is to make us clean; all we have to do is humbly ask, but for me it screamed something louder.

I relate to this man, not on the same level of course, but in a couple ways. There was a time in my life when I carried around a disease visible for all to see. It wasn’t an internal disease of sin I could hide, but I was noticeably sick. My actions were all too evident.  I was spiritually ill. At that time in my life, I wasn’t looking for a healing; I was comfortable being stuck in my selfish ways and if that wasn’t bad enough--I was never willing to kneel before the Lord. I was never willing for Him to reach out and touch me. There was no acknowledgment of Christ in my life. The world was my best friend. I thought all I needed was right in front of me. I was what the world likes to say "living it up." I carried my flaws on the outside for a few months-the parties, the heavy drinking, the boys, the drama, my selfishness; completely exposed for all to judge… and boy was I. But even then, I still didn’t feel the need to be different. It wasn't even that I was scared to be different obviously what people thought about me didn't bother me,  I just didn’t want change. I was NOT willing…simply not willing to give up my sicknesses…
...until one day I was reminded I could only serve one master. I could either live temporary for this world or live for Christ, but whichever I decided there was consequences and only 2 destinations that I could spend eternity. These verses clearly show the willingness of Christ to change a situation immediately, but it also took the willingness of the man that allowed Jesus to touch and rid him of his disease...acknowledging He is the only one capable of doing such thing.

Jesus has only one desire for us—yep just one. And that is for us to Be Willing.

When a person is willing they are saying “yes”. Our “yes” or our willingness rather creates an opening in our being that allows the Holy Spirit to do things, change things, remove things all while supernaturally He’s healing us, teaching us, guiding us…making us clean. Willingness encourages us to obey and give God control of our lives. Willingness can bring on a Christ-like lifestyle that pleases Him.  Willingness says yes I will choose to be different. But it all starts with a choice.

I would like to encourage those who have never been willing in the past, to kneel before a God that solely desires for you to be cleansed & healed from your past, bad memories, failures, fears, and daily insecurities. He wants us all to be willing to surrender what we are for what we could become in Him. He is always willing to cleanse us from all our infirmities, our sins of our past, present and future.. But the question is are we willing to let Him?
It really is your choice, for we already know His answer is "Yes, I am willing, be clean."

With love & prayer,

Est