Bad company & constant knocking of sin at our door

Forgive me in advance, but in this blog it’ll be more like a vent session than anything else.. I have been so heavy hearted about something…


I am surrounded by many types of people on a daily basis…. And at times it can be challenging to continue to set yourself apart from staining personalities (I’ll explain), but it’s imperative that we do. Recently, I saw just how easy an unbeliever or maybe a “not as mature believer” can stain/influence a churched person aka believer..

I’ve been very observant of a very familiar routine. Without saying too much, I’ll give a brief example of a real life situation. I frequently over hear vulgar or unpleasant conversations. They go in one ear and out the other, but a few days ago I actually witnessed a conversation between a couple folks that made me feel down right uncomfortable. It was distasteful, full of gossip and just something I want no part of. One of the two people involved usually kept a good reign on their tongue, so I figured they would pull out of the conversation like usual, but surprisingly they didn’t. As a matter of fact, it was the complete opposite. They joined right in and began stirring up more slander, more useless words, and more fire. Being honest, I was upset maybe because I had higher standards for that particular person, but I was more upset to see a believer stained by a constant knocking of sin…

You see there are many sins that knock at our doors day in and out, and ultimately it is up to us whether we allow that door to be opened. When our door is being consistently knocked on with that same sin/aka influences of certain people, we usually do one of two things: continue and ignore the bang or let that sin right in. I’m a visual person and in my mind that’s how I view it.

I was driving home one day after a stop at wal mart and God showed me something  interesting through caramel apples. I was craving caramel apples so I was excited to eat one. You know they come in single packs or a package of 3. I of course got the package of 3 : ) I’m preggo I can’t help it. Anyways, I opened the package and began eating one. After about 3 bites I noticed a weird substance growing on the caramel. After spitting that out, I looked to see if the other two had the “growing substance” on them, and in fact the one I had started eating first, definitely had spread its disease. Because of the closeness to the rotten apple, there was a spreading of infection. Neither of the other two apples were removed in time, so they too were no good. At that moment I realized what God was showing me. When we surround ourselves with people that we know carry a particular disease and we KNOW through the test of time they don’t have a relationship with Christ, but we continue being that close they can begin to influence us, stain us with just a little of their disease, and ultimately fully infect us if we’re not removed on time. That is exactly why the bible is so clear to say in 1 Corinthians 15:33 “Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character." And that is exactly what’s going on in many people’s lives that I know personally…and that just breaks my heart.

To either “be nice” or “not feel superior” to people they blend themselves right in, but the truth is you don’t have to be mean, you don’t have to act like your better, but you must separate yourself from darkness, for we know the light and the dark don’t mix plain and simple, approach it with great wisdom. It took me many years to learn how to separate myself, I was once a fool of blending right in because I wanted acceptance. Then I learned whose acceptance mattered…and when I realized the entrance to heaven wasn’t given to me by being cool or fitting in, but by following God, things changed pretty quick.

“But Est, I’m not going to the party to get drunk, I’m just going to ‘hang out’ it’s boring on Saturday nights” Ok, but just know you will be stained. Take a coal for example, when it’s on fire it is HOT and if you touch it you get burned, but when that coal settles if you touch it you may not get burned, but what happens? Ever touched a dry coal, it stains your hand. It marks you with its color. You may not get burned but it marks you as one of them. Think of the people you consider friends. Should they be your friends? Should you go to the places they go? Should you support their lifestyle? Shouldn’t we be “that” friend that is saying “I know I’m not perfect, but I also know this continious lifestyle isn’t pleasing to God according to His word” and pulling them the opposite direction? That’s a real friend. Knowing that what this world has to offer is temporary, but what really matters is what takes place after this life and sharing that with your friends or acquaintances. What I am NOT saying is to cut people off and not extend an invite the other direction, but what I AM saying is cut off their influences, cut off their consistant knocking at your door…

Sis, bro, whoever is reading this--Keep your door slammed shut, locked and bolted when you’re around outside influences,

never touch fire,

and much less a settled coal for we know its purpose is to stain what Christ has already washed.

We are still the clay

"We are the clay, you are the potter" Isaiah 64:8

The room is quiet, and all is still...
I take advantage of these moments and lift my eyes to the one who makes the moon reflect the sun...
Then, I get lost in thought.
What do I think about? ::Sigh:: everytime it's something new. As gaze over the sky, looking at how
huge it is and how many stars their are, I think...each star must represent a child of God.
They shine so bright and are so beautiful...but at times, at times we lose our shine, we lose our beauty--
not in the eyes of God, but in our own eyes. Then saddness sets in.
I think of the endless miles of sky that covers all the universe and I think, that must be just how big
His love is for us...breath taking..

For the past few days, I've dug my nose in my bible and read what seems like verses I'd never seen before.
And maybe just maybe, there was a reason for it.
 Tonight, I want to encourage someone out there, that is down, restless, uncomfortable, uneasy...You are
on my heart. Going back to how people view themselves, it amazes me at how differently God sees us.
You may think, I don't have it all together like so and so, well guess what? They don't either.
But Est,I don't think I can really be this or that? Well where is your faith? In yourself or in God?
Think about it..
But it seems like all bad things happen to me and everyone around me is so happy? Does the Bible not say
that in all things God works for the good of those who love him?
And that He has a plan and purpose for all who love Him?
There are so many thoughts that bog us down daily, and strip us from doing the things God has called us to do...we are so distracted with....can I be honest? Ourselves. Our thoughts. Our ideas.
The way you view yourself, is nothing like God views you and nothing like your fellow Christians view you. So what's my point?
we all make mistakes, you know the beauty in these mistakes?
 Is that they are what make you human. Yes, we are respondsible for being Christ-like and
representing Him well, but if you and I were perfect, then would Jesus' death be in vain?
We're going to mess up, we're all going to fall short of His glory, don't let errors of everyday
weaken your faith, weaken your thoughts of yourself and who you are IN CHRIST, because
sister , brother, friend let me tell you something...You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are
designed by the hands of an Almighty God, You shine like the brightest star when He looks at you,
You are a Child of a living God.
How 'bout that?
Dust yourself off, get back up and in Jesus name, walk in faith and remember always remember,
We (His children, me, you) are still the clay, He is the potter (Isaiah 64:8)
Everyday you slip up, remember God is smoothing that kink out, when you feel like you're lost in your troubles, ideas, mess ups, remember you are being shaped and molded even in your trails, so today...
Right now, be thankful that you are still the clay.
You're not finished.

Today, I'm sending flowers.

I was reading a blog of a dear sister of mine, Theresa, and her blog completely moved me to the
point I had to respond. She spoke of a little old man in her church that had lost his wife years ago.
He stood up and began speaking great things of another gentleman (standing next to him) and
stated the words "We wait too late to send flowers"
He was talking about the flowers that we send to someones funeral. It's amazing to me that so many
times we think the world about someone, but never share it. Today, I don't want to wait until your
funeral to tell the world how much you've helped me, how much I loved you, what memories we
had together, how good of a friend you were to me..Today, I'm sending flowers while I have you
here. Now, I may not mention my immediate family (hubby, mom etc) but because I feel like I tell
ya'll all enough, but to those I don't always tell you how great you are, this is for you.

Sissy-I love you. You have taught me so much. You've taught me that sometimes the world isn't
always the nicest, but the bigger lesson I've learned is: you're a true example of what God's grace
can do--Turn someone around over night.
You have a heart full of love to give to all and I hope that one day you can reach across the furthest
lands to spread that love you have in your heart.

Eloise- Thank you. For everything. I can't imagine my life without a friend like you. You've never
failed me, but always have been there. No matter what is going on in my life good or bad, you're
there for it and for that I could never repay you.

Jax-You have a heart of gold. Plain and simple.
You have seen me at my worst and at my best, and yet always
 remained faithful as my friend. You've always loved me, for who I was (goofy, silly, sometimes
 insecure of myself) and still till this day, I know you take me as I am and are one of my biggest fans.
You are my sister, who I'd never trade for anything in this world!

Kaylie-I've never met a more sincere person than you. Something that I've learned from you is to
smile. No matter what is going on around you, you brave a smile and to me your smile speaks
volumes.Your genineness is like no one else, you may not say a whole lot, but when you do people
can rest assure you're sincere and I promise your few words have impacted many lives.
I know I can always count on you to be a true friend and for that I love you.

Becky-My sweet little cousin, you're a doll. Thank you for always being there for me when
Stephen was deployed. Whether it was taking me to get food or just always extending a
helping hand. It was one of the toughest times in my life, and you were always there to lift me
up when I needed it the most. I'll never forget that. You have a huge chunk of my heart.

Holly-You're the strongest woman I've ever befriended. I thank you for two things: making
me realize that my bad days are nothing compared to what they could be and two never letting
me forget who it is that comes to our rescue everytime. Sometimes people don't give God the
 recognition of where their life could have gone had it not been for His grace, but you are always
quick to give God the glory. Thank you for helping me sharpen my strength in Christ.

Marcie-It seems like I've known you for years! I love how comfortable we are with one
another. I've never had that come so easily when I first meet someone.
I've watched you grow into such an amazing woman of God and let me tell you, I can bet it has
encouraged many people besides myself. Thank you for all your prayers, because if I know
one thing about you, it's that I can always count on you to lift me up when I need it most. You
are very special and dear to my heart!

Jeanie-When I think of you, I think of someone that will be my friend regardless what I do. I honestly
feel that if I committed a crime, you'd still back me up against the world. You are the true definition
of faithful. I'm so glad that we were able to stay friends regardless of the other circumstances you
went through, because that just shows how strong our friendship really was and is. You know I
will always be in your corner. Love you to pieces

Kaci-You're my sister in law and not to be biased, a pretty amazing one! I knew I married into a
good family, but when I met you I realized I married into a greeat family. You have always been
nothing but sweet to me and encouraging. I know in the last couple months I really leaned on you
and I'm so glad I did, because you were always there to listen. Even if you didn't say much, knowing
you were on the other end made all the world of a difference. Thank you for being so caring.

Anna- I really miss you. You are ALWAYS going to be special to me because you were the first
person I trusted with my baby outside my family. You made the transition from being a stay
at home mom to a working mom so easy for me. You always made me feel comfortable knowing
Addie was in good hands and you'll never know how much I appreciated you. It was so hard
for me to let Addie go, but you are seriously an angel. I would trust you with any of my children
so come back to the US so you can be my personal nanny! :)


Shelley MacDonald- I just want to say that I may not know you as
well as I should, but something you need to know is when I get older and my children have children,
I want to be as good of a grandma as you are to your grandbabies. You honestly have such
a sweet soul. God bless you always Gma Shelley!

T- I'm not even sure there are words to describe you other than beautiful!
Thank you for being who you are. You are an example of what it means to shine your light for Christ.
You've encouraged and motivated me when I've had a rough day. I thank you for your love
for God and your willingness to express it outloud. I think you are an amazing woman of God
and bless all those in connection with you.

Staci- I can't thank you enough for our many conversations about God and church. I love
how you push me to go further and deeper with my relationship with God. You've said sometimes
you run people off because of your outspokeness of God, well I say it's drawn me to you! And
through you, I've learned that everyday we encounter people going to hell and it's OUR job to be
a voice of hope.
Please continue to be that voice, because the few you run off will not compare to the many you
bring to Christ! You rock sister!

Missy-There is something about you that I love. Though I do not know
you on a personal level, I've noticed your constant reach out to me through facebook. I've been
following your facebook for a while, and all I can say is I hope my daughter grows up to have many
of your qualities. You are such a smart, sweet, level headed girl, and yes I hope that one day
you can give my Addie piano lessons! She'll learn from the best for sure! :)

Delana & Cecilia- You guys are put together for a reason lol. Maybe it's because I really see
ya'll as close as sisters, but to both of you I feel the same about. I love you
girls, ya'll have known me since before I could shave my legs and though we've drifted apart
over several years, we've never lost our friendship. You guys have always had my back and
always told me I could do anything. You both give me hope and never fail to tell me I am doing
a good job even when I feel like I'm not. Ya'll mean the world to me, honestly. Thank ya'll.

Madison- You make me want to dream. I love you for your braveness. When I think of
someone I would want to be for a day, it may just be you because I think of you and how much
of a chicken I am in comparison to you. Ha! You aren't afraid to take risks and live,
(close to Jesus of course) but what I mean is not live in fear, not live in the fear of unfamiliar,
you dare to dream and that is so admirable to me. you'll never know how much I appreciate your
outgoing attitude.
If I could be a 1/4 of who you are, I know I'd just be that much more of a well rounded person.
You seriously are an all-star in my book!

Denise, Tavia, Kira, Whitney, Krystle, Malinda, Cassie Cambern, Ruby, Jazmin
Mysti, Ashley S. Aunt Tanya, Momma Debbie, Mindy F, Cadie Cat & Erin P-
 All you girls do one thing to me: keep me
encouraged! I definitely take notice, because it is so important to me. Everyone needs a good
support system and I know I have that in each of you!
Ya'll each have pushed and encouraged me at some point with your sweet comments,
to continue doing what I do. Thank you all for your words, ya'll have kept me going when I'm barely
truckin'. Love ya'll!