So, you’re a mom. You have a full time job, a husband, 2 plus kids, a week’s worth of laundry, 2 dogs, a cat, and you wish there were more time in a day? Perfect, you fit right in!
According to the 2012 U.S. Census 71% of all mothers hold a full time job. That makes thousands of us all trying to raise children, have successful careers, keep the home, and make time for ourselves as well as for our spouse. As a mother myself, I know all the different directions I get pulled so today I want to talk about a direction that is very important, but gets less time than the time we have for ourselves. That’s play time with our kids. I did a poll of 50 mothers that were either family or friends of mine. The poll was the average number of hours they spent with their kiddos. According to my poll the average number was 1.3 solid hours of play time per day with their children.
With iPhones, iPads, iPods, and video games competing with your children’s attention it can be easy to allow technology to substitute the connection between you and your children, or make up for the time we do not always have to personally give them. Dr. Amanda Gummer a psychologist specializing in play and parenting suggests that children whom have play time with their parents will reap great benefits throughout their life. She explains that many types of play all contribute to different abilities a child will need throughout their life. Active play develops fitness and strength, role play can develop the imagination, crafts and construction develops creativity. (insert citation here)
Giving your children permission to imagine and be creative with you subliminally sends them a message that they can trust you. They feel safe thus in their latter years they can feel free to express to you some of their worries, fears, or concerns. As you read this you think
that is wonderful, and I need to play more with my child; I just wish I had the time.
What if I told you there is a way to bridge the gap between dinner, laundry, dishes, cleaning rooms/bathrooms and playing with your child, all while being efficient with your time so you have some for yourself and your spouse at the end of the night? “Is that even possible?” You asked? It is.
Today I’d like to share a few creative tips I have learned in my short 5 years of being a busy, working mother and wife to master all the above.
1.) As you’re making dinner include your children. Don’t shoo them out of the kitchen; some of the best science, math problems can be taught and stories can be told from cooking together. Let the children help with pouring and stirring. Explain where the food came from (the ground, an animal etc) this always brings up interesting questions and can encourage life lessons. Play restaurant as the children help set the table and fill the drinks.
2.) Doing laundry is definitely not one of my favorite things to do, but it is when I have my 5 year old playing basket-clothes. To play basket-clothes set out hampers and separate your clothing by taking turns to shoot the item into their correct baskets. Keep score, it is really fun to see their competitive side developing and their laughter when Momma misses.
3.) Do math while your children help you load the dishwasher. Ask them to count each item you give them to load. See how high they can count, and you can always do addition and subtraction, even multiplication or division for older kiddos.
4.) One of my most favorite cleaning games is playing Hotel Sweet. (This is the name of my daughter’s hotel) This is the best technique I have found to get my child to clean her room. I ask her if she has a room ready for me to check in-to and her face lights up because she knows we are about to get into character. She jumps up to clean her room and moments later she opens her bedroom door and hollers out," Hotel Sweet room 100 is ready for viewing." I roam around the room, like a guest looking at every crevice, and ask about all the accommodations of the hotel. I typically shake her hand and book her room for $5.00 (you can give whatever amount you’d like) her room definitely has the best rate in town! This is so much more appealing to a child than, “go clean your room,” and bonus they just earned allowance while having fun, playing and spending time with their parent.
5.) Clean your restroom while your child goes swimming! This is one of my children’s favorite games. Fill the tub of water and tell your child to imagine anything they want. They can go scuba diving, snorkeling, or swim in the ocean with dolphins. As your cleaning toilets and sinks ask questions about their play like, “I love all the bright fish I see; are you getting good pictures?” The children love it! Who would have thought that you could bathe your children while playing and cleaning!
Learning how to incorporate play into my schedule of responsibilities as a mother and wife has not only opened up more time for me, but has also helped me have a well balanced home. I must admit that the most satisfying thing has been the realization that what children want isn’t materials or electronics, what my children truly want is me.
Here’s to more time, play and fun!
Sincerely,
Esther Vanover
