Swimming against the current

Yesterday wasn't an ordinary Sunday. I was tired. I was grumpy. I was exhausted. I woke up with no expectations. I woke up empty minded and can I be honest? I felt like just going through the motions. You see lately, I've been fighting a pretty big battle. It's not like any of us aren't on the daily, because we are; however, this fight has been different for many reasons....

I was standing in the Church during worship when something very interesting happened. I was singing along to the lyrics on the screen, and as I let the words resignate in my being I closed my eyes, and this is what I saw.

 



I saw myself swimming. But not the usual splashing around in the summer time swimming, really swimming. And it wasn't any fun. I saw myself swimming upstream. I was kicking as hard as I could, the water was splashing all around me because of the impact, my arms were pressing toward parting the water and I saw just how exhausted I truly was. I saw that I was fighting against this current on my own, with my own swimming abilities, and end result... I was losing. All the hard swimming and pressing was just causing me to slowly drown because no believer is strong enough to fight alone, there was one key element missing.

 Jesus.

 You see, this uphill current or tide if you will represented the things I am fighting against daily. The things I want to shove, push and move out of my way that try to drown me and at that moment it's almost like I really felt the the water coming up my throat...I ran to the altar

"Lord, I am nothing without you, not a thing, all I need is YOU. You are my safe place, You are my strength, You are my everything." And just like that I felt a peace overwhelm me. God, is too incredible... I give all glory and honor and Praise to Him because He is so faithful to remind us just how much we are in need of a savior.

As we were walking out of Church heading to the car I had not given anymore thought about anything, my heart and mind was rested..I looked down as I was carrying my son and noticed how he peacefully slept in my arms. I immediately thought wow-this is how I feel; safely placed the arms of my Father, content and peaceful knowing I no longer have to swim (fight against the current) and I knew at that moment that I was where I always needed to be.

In His Arms.

...."For the battle is not yours, but God’s"

2 Chronicles 20:15 

With Love & Prayer,

Est