All I can do is just, be me.

Howdy! I am just so chipper today. The weather is so gorgeous
out today! I have come to realize a couple things. I love cold
weather... but only for a few reasons. Top 3 being that I can
dress up in big jackets, wear scarfs and gotta love the ugg boots.
Other than that-winter you're rough! Not exactly in central Texas,
but where I grew up we were in snow storms end of Nov-March. No lie.
I guess you get used to it after a few years, but it's still no
fun when it lasts longer than summer! Today, I've experienced the
warmth of the sun and now more than ever I'm ready for Spring!
There is only a few things {like chocolate, romantic comedies,
bubble baths, and back massages}that are better than Spring weather.
I'm not sure what it is, but I love opening the back pourch door
to let in some breeze, while I'm spring cleaning listening to my
all time favorite band..I like to open the blinds to allow the
beautiful sunshine in my home {{that magnifies all the dusty
furniture hah,}} nonetheless--I look forward to this.

You may wonder why I titled this blog "all I can do is just be me."
Well the answer to that is simple. Because that's all I can do.
I'm who God created me to be yes, I fully believe that, but He also
gave us free will, a mind of our own, and freedom to be creative in
being who we are.
A few things about me that I wanted to share {some people say I
don't share enough...ya I know right? hah I always share so much
it seems like}, but if you really are curious to know Me, the real
Me, here you are:

I am Esther Vanover no matter who is around. I never drop my morals
or values for anyone. I care nothing about being popular or
recognized, I think people that need praise everyday are some of
the most insecure people. I am scared of things I shouldn't be. I'm
definitely praying about that. I talk a lot. I would much rather
give than receive. I get irritated when
people are only who they are because they want to feel like they
belong--it's ok to be different. When I'm quiet that doesn't mean
i'm angry I'm probably thinking. I'm quick to apologize.
I can't stand knowing I hurt someones feelings. I dress weird
some-days. I think confidence is more than skin deep. I like originality.
I like friendly competition. I genuinely feel convicted if I hear
someone talk bad about another person. I'm careful who I trust.
I can keep secrets.I hate gossip. I can not function correctly
if I am not in Church every Sunday {I will have a horrible week}
I'm quiet and reverent in Church {I swear I feel like God will
strike me dead if I'm not
haha}
the best feeling in my world is to get lost in worship and I have
no care in the world who is watching. I love good lyrics and
rarely listen to anything other than Christian music. I'm careful
what I listen too hence why K-love is my only set station in my car.
I never watch scary movies. Everything I do,
I am careful to give God the glory for.
I never want to be that person that triumphs and feels
successful without recognizing the one who gave those blessings
to me. I never give up on people I love and know has potential.
I'm compassionate, and sometimes get taken advantage of. I still
haven't learned my lesson.I hate "know it alls" cause they really don't.
I get very emotional when I hear bad news about children. I respect
single mothers this job is really tough as it is with two parents.
I am in love with scents. Things that smell good make me smile.
I dream big and push my limits.
I never drink enough water. I would rather have a sweet tea or
dr.pepper over any other drink. Gangsters terrify me lol
I love that i'm imperfect. Do I
think that gives me justification to do wrong things? No. But I
love it because I know that I'll always need Jesus. I never want
to get to a point where I feel like I can do anything on my own.
I love sports. I miss playing college volleyball. I like a clean
home it makes me feel good. I am addicted to my iPhone. I spend
too much time on Facebook. I can't help but to think about all my
closest friends at least once a day. I talk to my daddy every morning.
I love to talk to God,
I enjoy a walk in the park
just with nature, Him & I although I rarely get the chance to.
I'm overly emotional, but learning to be strong in Christ. I'm never satisfied with who I am. I guess it's because I never want the Lord
to be finished with me. I dislike when people count the things
they've done for you. I love BIG. I try really
hard to see the best in everyone because I know God made them for
a purpose. I cry too easy. I depend on my family A LOT. I pray all
the stinkin' time. I follow my heart & stay true to myself.
I really believe I have all I need in this life. I could go the rest
of my life without heavy traffic.
It's painful when I make the decision to cut ties with toxic people,
but Gods word says
Bad company corrupts good character! I like people who practice what
they preach. I know that when you're successful there will always be
those who would kill to see you fail. I'm always the first to admit
my failures, or short comings. I don't like getting picked apart
for being human.
I get annoyed when people talk bad about their parents.
I'm stubborn, but when it's my turn to lose I really let it go.
I HATE when people say GD.
I'm passive, and hate confrontation but I am strong willed.
I will never let anyone ruin my marriage, friendships or family.
I get sick to my stomach when I see people complain about how
hard their life has
been {when clearly they are spoiled}and there are people out in
3rd world countries with serious issues. I try to understand people,
I really do, but sometimes I think their issues are self centered.
With my whole heart I always try to do what I feel is right,
not just because God is watching me, but simply because it's just
the right thing to do. If I could feed, shelter, treat, love on all
the homeless, abused, or abandoned people that would be a dream job. If
I had all
the money in the world I trust my heart enough to say it would go
to more places and people than for my own personal pleasures.
I love going on vacations and seeing new places. I like fatty foods
and hate working out. I think my husband is the smartest man
I've ever met. I hold very high {sometimes unrealistic standards
for him} People that are team players are who I tend to be
best friends with. I like humble people. I don't do well with "self-
righteous people." I dream of the day I'll see Jesus face to face.
I wish
I could find a cure for all terminal diseases.
I never feel like I do enough for the kingdom of God. I give credit
where credit is due. I really think that I have been
blessed beyond measure and i'm careful to count my blessings. I have
an amazing husband that I know was who God made for me...He
is a wonderful father, both my parents are alive
and well, I have good health, success in my job, awesome siblings,
a saved family,clothes, water, food, air, a home 2 cars
and a beautiful
baby girl.. I truthfully have NOTHING to complain about,yet I find
something to be upset about.. if
anything I should be more thankful to my heavenly Father for
always giving me what I need.
And well there you have it. My thoughts, desires, and flaws-I'd never
want to be someone else because...well that's not who God created me
to be..all I can do is just. be. me.
~Sincerely
The Real Esther.